WHEN THE ACTIONS OF FRIENDS OFFEND YOU, HOW DO YOU REACT?

SCRIPTURE:
Therefore, my brothers, you whom I love and long for, my joy and crown,
that is how you should stand firm in the Lord, dear friends!
(Philippians 4:1)

MEDITATION:
Paul had a great concern and love for his Christian friends.
Even though they were Gentiles from a pagan background,
and were from a different race and nation from Him,
Paul still loved them and missed them.

He called them “brothers” and “dear friends”
and referred to them as his “joy” and his “crown”.
Instead of pointing out their flaws, he wanted to encourage them.
“Joy” means a feeling of great pleasure and happiness.
“Crown” basically categorizes them as “the best”.

What great encouragement from their friend and role model!
One of the instructions Paul gave them was to “stand firm in the Lord”.
He knew how the things of the world
could have an adverse influence on believers,
so he warned them about compromising their status as a Christian.

Look at how Paul gingerly addressed a problem within the church
when two 'good' women were quarreling.
I plead with Euodia and I plead with Syntyche to agree with each other in
the Lord. Yes, and I ask you, my true companion, help these women since
they have contended at my side in the cause of the gospel, along with
Clement and the rest of my co-workers, whose names are in the book of life.
(Philippians 4:2-3)
Paul knew how this could cause problems within the church body,
so he wanted someone to get word to them that he was concerned.

But look at his message to the others in the church.
Paul wanted them to help these women resolve their differences,
but he also pointed out how they had faithfully
worked with him for the cause of the gospel.

Do you see what Paul did?
He reminded the other believers that these two ladies were good people,
but they had some issue that needed to be resolved.

How many times do we allow our selfish feelings
to prevent us from enjoying the good in others?
How many times do we find ourselves focusing on the negatives
and ignoring the positives in others?
This type of attitude will never solidify relationships with others.
In fact, it could cause an existing relationship to crumble.

No person enjoys being under anyone’s microscope except God’s.
(they probably don’t enjoy His either until they realize
that He examines them in order to help them)
The Bible tells us we all have faults, but too often we overlook our own.
We need to concentrate on ways to lift the spirits of others
rather than focusing on ways to tear down their self-esteem.

We should remember that we offend God, but He loves us anyway.
If someone offends us, we need to rise above our selfishness
and let love override our anger, disappointment, or hurt feelings.
Like Paul, our goal should be to look for ways to encourage them,
as opposed to punishing them by withdrawing our love from them.

ACTION:
Have you been focusing on the faults of others while ignoring your own?
Have you allowed the flaw or failure of a friend
to negatively impact your opinion of them?

What efforts have you made to encourage a friend
as opposed to pointing out their failures?
As Christians, we have a responsibility to love others
in the same manner that God loves us – unconditionally.

Pray,
“Heavenly Father, forgive me for improperly reacting to the failures of 
friends due to my own selfishness. Thank You for loving me unconditionally. 
Help me to love my friends in the same way You love me. Teach me how to set 
aside my selfish attitudes when I am offended by friends. Remind me that I 
also have faults and fashion in me a new attitude that allows me to love 
and encourage instead of finding and focusing on faults of my friends. Teach
me to look for the good in my friends and remember that they are Your 
creations and You love them at all times. Thank You for forgiving me of my 
failures and encouraging me in many different ways. Convict me of my 
selfishness whenever I allow the failures of my friends to change my 
attitudes toward them. You make it so very easy for me to love You at all 
times. I am grateful that You are my Heavenly Father.”